Time for a change?

Is there anything about yourself that you're a little bit sensitive about? That you know isn't perfect but you struggle to change it. No I'm not talking about weight although that can definitely be a sensitive topic.

The issue that I am struggling with is the volume of my voice. I've always known that I have had a loud voice, and growing up as the youngest of 6 children, it was one of the ways that you were able to be heard. As I've gotten older, occasionally people have commented on my loud voice, and for some reason it has always been one of the most sensitive issues for me and it always upsets me. You'd think that the mere fact that I know I have a loud voice, would mean that it wouldn't bother me. But for some reason it does. I wish my volume was softer, and I have tried many many times to be quieter, but what happens is that when I get comfortable with people or a situation, my volume naturally goes up. I'm naturally a chatty, bubbly and happy person. My moods are pretty even and happy. You know what you're going to get when you see me. I enjoy people's company and I'm pretty certain that people enjoy mine. But for some reason, when someone comments on my loud voice, I take it really personal, and take it as an attack on who I am, even though I know that it isn't. Automatically I decide "well then I won't speak at all!". I temporarily go very into myself, and sad.

So, how do I create a balance? How do I reduce the volume of my voice and not reduce my personality, which, I do actually, for the most part really like. Is it something that you can consciously work on, or is it like a laugh, something that is innate?

I'm not sure anymore. I have been aware of this aspect of me, and been trying to change it for as long as I can remember. I haven't changed so far.

By the way, it has been mentioned that I lower my voice volume as part of professional competence as a trainee teacher. I get that a lower volume in a classroom means that the kids are quieter, but should my volume in the staffroom be an issue? I would love your thoughts and ideas on this.

9ft pregnant ladies, Ludo and Dorothy

So I had a week's holiday last week, and it was well needed and enjoyed. I was actually incredibly productive and managed to achieve a lot of "to do's" as well as relaxation and rest.

I caught up with friends and family, and it was fantastic to not have any worries about school and just enjoy. So I was at my sister's house drinking cider, eating our obligatory nachos (yum yum) and generally chatting, when the discussion of the latest installation at the Art Gallery came up. I'm not a huge Art Gallery patron. In fact, I almost never go there, and the last time I actively made sure I went to an exhibition was for an incrdible black and white photography exhibition which was incredible. Her name was Ans Westra, and she is originally from Holland. If you want to see more about her, I found this:

http://www.fhegalleries.com/artists/showArticle.php?file=answestra.xml

So anyway, this time it was for an exhibition that looked at bodies in different contexts and size, and was a series of amazing displays of people that looked incredibly real, right down to the goosebumps or veins under the skin, but had been totally created. It was absolutely phenomenal. His name is Ron Mueck and I highly recommend that you go and see this exhibition. It's on in the Christchurch Art Gallery for the next 3 months or so. What made this so incredible was the way that he played with dimensions and perspectives and on most of the sculptures, the body was naked so as not to distract from the absolute beauty and intricacy of the art. There was a 9 ft full term pregnant woman in absolute proportion, looking shattered and deflated as she reached the end of her pregnancy. There were tiny gossiping old woman, giant babies complete with an umblilico cord, and a wild man with a look of utter fear on his face, as he knew he was trapped in a world where he did not belong. You can see some of these sculptures at this website:

http://hubpages.com/hub/Awesome_Sculptures_Of_Ron_Mueck

Giant Pregnant woman. I actually took a lot of photos of this exhibition myself, but am too lazy to upload them

Now when I looked at this website, it was the first time I had actually looked him up, and I decided that besides being an absolutely exceptional artist and sculptor, he gains even more legend status in my mind for being the voice Ludo from one of my absolute favourite movies of all time, Labyrinth. It actually makes sense really, as he was a model maker, so it actually ties very clearly with his exhibition.

"Ludo....friend"

Anyway, Ron Mueck, you are my new hero. I also think that Seth McFarlane, creator and voice of most of the characters on Family Guy is incredible. I love that show, and love how they just poke fun at everything, including Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz. I actually saw it again, with my sister and her kids the other day, as the Art Gallery was showing it for free just after we arrived. Not wanting to offend the gods of Serendipity we went and watched it (me for the 4th or 5th time) but for the kids and my sis, for the first. It was great. I love that movie. Seeing the end again though, reminded me of this Family Guy parody:



Oh how I laughed.