No Plan B

Sorry about my slightly bitter last post. I actually am a romantic, and at work on Valentine's Day, the cool chick from the cafe next door told me that she had driven to her boyfriend's house, and sprinkled rose petals on his bed while he was at work. That's pretty damn romantic.

Anyway, it's all over and done with for another year. I know that many people in relationships don't do it either, as pointed out by my sister. I do realise this. I was just having a moment of self-absorbed bitterness about my singledom. Moment over.

So yesterday I got called up by the New Zealand Graduate School of Education. 10 years ago I went to Teacher's Training College, did well, had a bit of a nervous breakdown, decided I needed to live a bit more life and quit. I never expected to go back to train to be a primary teacher, or even want to. However, I had a few epiphanies while I was in South America, the biggest being that this profession that I had wanted to be since I was about 3 years old, I actually still want to be. But also that I will never go back to Teacher's College, as there, they treat you like 5 year olds. So lucky for Christchurch, where I live, that there is another option. Graduate School supposedly is much more highly revered by the teaching profession, thus more likely to gain a job from, is more difficult a course and last but not least more difficult to get into.

So far though, I'm on the right track. I have an interview next Friday. That in itself is not so impressive. Absolutely everybody gets an interview. I really want to get in. I really want to be a teacher.

However, I've also decided to treat it like fate, and if I don't get in I'm not meant to be a teacher. I'll do something else. Not that I know what that something else is yet. I don't have a Plan B. For someone that has always had Plan B's, C's and D's this is a big thing. I am expecting to get in. I want to get in. I am going to try my hardest to prove to them that I am worth taking in and by not having a plan B I am hoping not to fail.

I have no idea what I'll do if I don't get in. I don't want to think about a Plan B til I have to think of one. All going to my Plan A, the only thing I'll be worrying about soon is how to cope with student life again. After 5 years since I was one, it's going to be a challenge. But a challenge that I can handle.